Wednesday

The Hidden Demoralization In Your Own Thinking

PEOPLE DON'T REALIZE they are being defeatist and pessimistic when they say things like, "that's just the way I am," or "power corrupts," or "that's just my luck." If you were to analyze even a fairly optimistic person, you'd find some pessimism in their utterances. It is amazing, once you're aware of it, how often and in how many different contexts people are pessimistic and defeatist. Including you.

But, of course, you can do something about it. And if you did, you'd be happier and more successful. And healthier. This isn't my opinion. The results have been verified by hundreds of rigorous studies.

What can you do to become less pessimistic? Undemoralize yourself regularly. Do it whenever you feel any negative emotion.

If you do this, your first discovery is that you have hidden forms of pessimism strewn throughout your "normal" way of thinking. As you get rid of these, you'll be amazed at your newfound lightheartedness and you'll be impressed at your newly discovered determination, motivation, and persistence.

But first you'll be unhappily surprised to find you're much more pessimistic than you ever suspected.

I often recommend someone does the undemoralizing exercise every day for an hour. I tell them, "Do that for a week and get back to me." It can absolutely transform a person. They had no idea that their feelings of discouragement were being generated in their own mind. It's almost embarrassing. All this time, it seemed like the circumstances were causing the bad feelings. But most
literally most of the negative, defeated, depressed feelings they've been having are caused by nothing more than simple mistakes in their own automatic thoughts.

It may be embarrassing and it may even be demoralizing to discover yourself thinking so negatively, but on the other hand, it is great news. You can be much happier and much more motivated by doing something fairly easy (undemoralizing yourself).

Start today. Undemoralize yourself for an hour a day and get back to me in a week. What did you discover? How do you feel?

The results you gain last you a lifetime. Do the work now, as soon as possible, because the change in the way you think will become habitual and will make you more persistent, resilient, motivated, and optimistic for the rest of your life.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I want to quote your post in my blog. It can?
And you et an account on Twitter?

Adam Li Khan said...

Yes you can quote me on your blog. And yes, I have a Twitter page for Moodraiser:

http://twitter.com/moodraiser